We're Official!!!

We were officially "Logged in" to China's system as of Monday, March 24th!  This means we are officially recognized as a family who is eligible to adopt from China and can begin receiving referrals!  I cannot even explain how elated I was when I saw that log in date posted.  It was the culmination of months and months of work and brings us that much closer to our child. 
 

A new shared list came out Monday and I was kind of hoping our child was on that list but we didn't receive a call yesterday about it, so I guess we'll just have to wait!  I am so thankful we serve a God who we can put our hopes and fears totally on his good shoulders!  His timing is perfect and, even though the wait is difficult, I know He has our child already chosen for us and will reveal them to us at just the right time. 

We're moving as fast as we can, baby!  My prayer is that you somehow know we are coming for you and have hope that there are people on the other side of the world who already love you more than you will ever know!

DTC!!

Our Dossier was sent to China (DTC) on Friday March 14th!  This step feels like such an accomplishment.  At the beginning of the process, we looked a that loooong list of required paperwork and it felt almost impossible to get it all done and here we are, seven months later, sending it all to China! 

The next step is receiving our log-in-date which makes us "officially" eligible to adopt and we can begin receiving referrals!!!  It could be anytime now or as long as several months before our referral is accepted but I cannot wait to see the face of our son or daughter for the first time. 

Come on Log in!!

Day dreaming

I'm day dreaming again.....

I don't post my feelings often because they are so mixed up at times I don't know what I'm feeling from one day to the next.  I'm not sure if anyone reads this blog anyway, so I figured I would document some of my emotions for my child.  I want him/her to know how much I longed for them.

I'm day dreaming about them being home.  Playing with Brooklyn.  Rocking them to sleep at night.  I wonder what will be their favorite song?  I wonder what they will like to read and eat and play with? 

I day dream about the day we will meet them.  How will I feel?  How will they feel?  Will they see my face and see love or be afraid? 

I day dream about how they will look.  Sometimes I shop for clothes for them, putting things in my online cart and then deleting the cart because I can't order yet.  I don't know their gender or pants size or shoe size.

I day dream about their little personality (or if like Brooklyn, their BIG personality).  What will make them laugh?  What will make them jump in excitement?  What will break their heart?

I do know our child is out there.  It's so unfair that they are not with us now.  Why must we wait?

Why?  Because it's not God's time yet.  And I believe God is good.  That's all I know but it's enough to keep the tears away most days.  So for now, I just day dream about our life that seems so far away.  So impossible.  But God makes the impossible possible, doesn't he?

Hope to post soon with good news we've received our log in date with China and officially eligible to receive our child's referral!

Kisses in the wind

I know it might sound strange because, after all, we haven't even been assigned a child yet but the last few days I have had this strong longing for our China baby. Frustration that we have to wait so long and sadness that Brooklyn doesn't have her sister/brother yet and our family isn't whole. It's hard to explain how you can feel emptiness for something so intangible.

I read this poem today that brings tears to my eyes. This is what I wish we could send our child. I wish they could know just how much they are wanted....

KISSES IN THE WIND

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...
Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.
But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.

--- Unknown